Sweets from the adult world

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Text: Anastasia Karpushkina
Photo: Aliona Ryne

Russian version

Oral lubricant is an incredibly convenient thing. Especially for those with a sweet tooth. Although I am not, the opportunity to taste something sweet and tasty, but at the same time not to gain weight, will delight, if not every person, then almost everyone. And so, you choose any lubricant to your taste (in the truest sense of the word) and forget about everything in the world! You wake up – and the bottle is almost empty. But there is no harm, and the brain is happy and content.

I loved BioMed Nutrition brand long before I saw their production site (yes, I was there, but more on that later). Look closely at the photo of the thigh (it's mine), and now at the company logo. And now again on my thigh. Amazing, right? You can say I'm a godsend for them, ha-ha!

Born in the 90s, I have always (as I'm used to) believed that our, domestic products are bad. Therefore, to escape subjectivity we will analyze the lubricants, according to tradition, point by point.

Packaging – 4.5 out of 5

Bottles look equally good and are part of the Juicy Fruit collection. The brand recently changed the label, and now the bottles are decorated with a photo of a cocktail that the lubricant tastes of. These are black bottles (I have 200 ml), which were initially closed not only with a protective film, but also had a "seal" on the neck. Two-factor authentication, cool! I really do not like it when someone else uses such intimate things before me. And if toys can be washed, then lubricants… you understand. The name is written to the right of the image of the cocktail – it is easy to read, this is a big plus. I lacked the function of “extruding” through the spout, so minus half a point.

Manual – 5 out of 5

I could have reduced a bit for the fact that the guide is only in Russian. But for me personally, there are no downsides to this! I think when the company decides to go global, they will add foreign language.

The letters are large and clear, the text is literate – great! I really liked the fact that in the method of application, the manufacturer indicated the application to the outer surface of the condom. People often forget that STDs are also transmitted orally, and the manufacturers subtly remind them of this. That's the kind of care fr om BioMed Nutrition!

Taste – 5 out of 5

Well, here's a clean hit! A pure delight. I'm fed up with all these caramels and strawberries – trivial. But Energetics and Bailey’s...

The first is very similar to Red Bull. This is my favorite drink of all! I just dream when a soda energy drink, but without taurine, will appear in Russia. In the meantime, I will enjoy the lubricant.

The second, to get to the real Bailey’s, almost lacks the bitterness of alcohol. That is, that coffee-chocolate taste is straightforward, but a little bit under... I do not take away the point for this, since it is impossible to fully reproduce the taste of an alcoholic drink. Personally, this lubricant reminds me of coffee lollipops – great.

The taste is not sugary, full-bodied, but without extreme. You know, very stretched because of the consistency. It is not syrupy, there is no nasty bitterness in the mouth and throat, like with most lubricants. That is, the impression is not overshadowed by anything, I do not want to drink water after it – this is one of the main criteria, so I gave the maximum points.

Consistency, composition and use – 5 out of 5

Lubricants have a water-gel consistency. They do not flow like water, but they also do not shake like jelly. The composition of the lubricants is natural. Before typing the second word, I stroked my left wrist with the fingers of my right hand, wh ere I had “left” the lubricant a few minutes ago. Feeling like I just put nourishing cream on my hands. Nothing sticks, it smells great (tasty, like the lubricant itself), the taste has “gone out” a little, but mostly it survived, which I am pleasantly surprised about.

Both lubricants are comfortable for me to use. They are not long-lasting, for a couple of “trials”. If you are looking for something conditionally timeless, I would advise you to choose some lubricant from the System JO line. But be prepared for cloying! Here, there is an excellent combination of precisely the presence of lubricating and flavoring components. Salivation increases, but the glide is excellent, and the lips are moisturized.

I gave my friends a try on lubricants. Some of them noted something like numbness in the mouth. This is the enveloping effect. That is, the consistency seems to lie in your mouth and take care of your tongue, gums, palate and cheeks. Some may not get it, so keep in mind. True, it is worth noting that all this takes place in just a couple of minutes.

The result is 5 out of 5

Despite the fact that these lubricants are produced in a small town of Chekhov near Moscow, the quality is of the highest class. You can see how they are doing in BioMed Nutrition here. Personally, I was just shocked by the sterility and beauty. Sometimes it’s scary to use something because you don’t know how it was produced. But I saw how these products turned out, so wrap everything up for me, please.

I am very glad that our manufacturers can boast of such high quality products!

And I want to remind you that it is better not to use oral lubricant vaginally or anally, and also do not forget about individual intolerances: please test products at the bend of the elbow.

Editor’s: Lubricants produced by Biomed Nutrition are sold under the brand name of Dzhaga-Dzhaga.